


I Miss You, So I'm Dreaming

by glitterjungwoo



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dreams, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Insomnia, Lucid Dreaming, M/M, Rebellion, Road Trips, Worldbuilding, sketchy corporations
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-10-18 04:22:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17573786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterjungwoo/pseuds/glitterjungwoo
Summary: In a world where destined soulmate comes to you in flashes during your dreams once you turn the age of 16, it sucks to be Ten who's an insomniac. Especially if said world automatically rules you out from having a soulmate at all because of it.Johnny has always had the perfect and traditional expectations of falling in love. So when he and Ten meet, the two are at two different ends of the spectrum but still find themselves drawn to each other.The beginning of their friendship leads them to do things they would've never imagined, challenging their own views on their society, and realizing that there's bonds that run deeper than the one the universe has predestined for them.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this fanfic sitting in my google docs collecting dust since last year. I was nervous to post it back then and still a bit insecure about it but here I am now-posting it. This fanfic is going to be drastically different from the rest of my posts, and a lot less explicit (lmao). I hope you guys enjoy it and please let me know your thoughts I would appreciate it so much! 
> 
> If you want you can follow my main twitter @nekojungwoo for any updates and possibly some previews!!!

Johnny Seo is 20 years old, but he’s been obsessed with finding his soulmate since he was 13 and reading fiction novels about people finding their other half that he would buy second-hand and stuff under his bed. Although he wouldn’t get the first glimpse of his soulmate until a week after his 16th birthday, every night he went to sleep hoping to see anything that could be related to his soulmate. Everyone was generally excited about seeing their soulmate in their dreams and eventually finding each other in real life, but Johnny took it to the next level. He started filling out journals when he was 14, documenting everything he could remember about the dream he just had the night before. Several hours were poured into researching endlessly about the different ways soulmates found each other: people who were coworkers for years before realizing that they were soulmates, childhood friends connecting the dots, etc. Johnny wanted that for himself, he was a hopeless romantic. He wanted to feel the rush that people described when they figured out who their soulmate was, the moments before the first kiss filled with tension and anticipation. 

 

His parents had met in the most unconventional way. His dad accidentally rear ended his mother’s car at a red light, extremely pissing off his mother who was already running late to work. She was about ready to throw her coffee in his face when they both got out of their cars and met each other’s eyes for the first time. His dad says that he would have recognized her height anywhere. The first dream he had related to his soulmate was him standing right next to her and realizing that his soulmate was several inches taller. Not only that, but he had enough dreams to where he could put together the pieces of his mother’s appearance together and recognize her on the spot. Although his mother was still upset about her car and being late to work, his father took her out for dinner after her shift and the rest is history. 

 

When Johnny finally had his first dream about his soulmate, it only lasted for a second before quickly merging into another dream. He managed to see the image of a boy in the distance with dark hair, walking with his back facing Johnny. Even so, he can’t help himself from seeing anyone at his high school who fits those requirements with a hint of suspicion. At one point he suspected his friend Jung Jaehyun, but that ended quickly when his friend told him about how his soulmate was definitely not Johnny because they happened to be a few inches shorter than him. Jaehyun knew about Johnny’s obsession with dreams since they were 14 and he found Johnny’s journal on his desk by accident. He didn’t judge him for it, the most he did was lightly tease him about how secretive he was about it all but never crossed any lines with it. If it weren’t for Jaehyun, Johnny was sure that his grades would’ve tanked throughout high school, especially after his first soulmate dream. He dove headfirst into expanding his research and couldn’t escape from it. 

 

Although it’s been 4 years since his first dream, he’s only had about 5 dreams about his soulmate. The most recent 2 having occurred within the past month. It is said that their frequency is related to your proximity to your soulmate. The closer you are, the more they occur. Johnny has been unfortunate in that he’s never seen his soulmates face. He’s always either too far away, or facing the other direction, and the dreams never last long enough for him to make any progress. He only knows that his soulmate has black hair, and has increased the amount of studs in his ears over the years. 

 

Currently, Johnny is sitting at the dinner table in Jaehyun’s apartment. When he wasn’t busy doing his research, he liked to bother Jaehyun and tell him about whatever new information he had gathered. Jaehyun would tell Johnny any updates he had on his soulmate. Recently, Jaehyun’s soulmate dyed their hair red and he was thankful that now at least his soulmate would stick out more in a crowd. Johnny was a bit jealous, anyone could fit the description of his soulmate. Black hair wasn’t uncommon and piercings were too hard to spot from a distance. 

 

“I had another dream about him last night, and just like all the other times before it all faded away before I could see his face,” Johnny groaned.

 

Jaehyun looked up from what he was cooking on the stove, “did you at least get to see something new? Is his hair still black?”

 

Johnny nodded, “yeah he hasn’t dyed his hair or anything, but I noticed that he has a new stud in his ear. I looked it up right away and apparently the one he got hurts like a bitch. Whoever this guy is, he must have a high pain tolerance for this.”

 

“I wonder how your soulmate is gonna react when he finds out you cried after getting your ear pierced.” 

 

“Jaehyun please don’t tell him, what if he’s like you and never lets me live it down for the rest of my life?” Johnny remembers that day so vividly. Jaehyun went with him into the Claire’s at the mall in their hometown and laughed at him the entire ride home when Johnny cried after the piercer was done. It didn’t help that right after Johnny got his ears pierced, a 5 year old got their doubles in and didn’t even flinch. 

 

“Anyways, moving aside from traumatic life experiences, I think I’m going to try lucid dreaming tonight.” Jaehyun turned off the stove and sat across from Johnny. “And why is that?”

 

“I was doing some searching online yesterday and long story short I ended up on this website where people who lucid dream look for their other half.”

 

Jaehyun looked visibly confused, “why would people go there of all places? What does lucid dreaming have to do with this?”

 

Johnny waited until he had his attention again to further explain, “apparently, someone found out that if you and your soulmate lucid dream on the same night, you can end up finding each other in your dreams. And it makes sense! You tend to have control over what occurs in a lucid dream, so the mutual desire from the couple wanting to meet each other enables them to finally meet on a different level.”

 

“This sounds pretty legit, but why try it if you have no idea if your soulmate even knows how to or about lucid dreaming? What if you don’t succeed tonight?”

 

“Don’t worry, I’m just doing a practice run tonight. I’ll worry about that later once I get the hang of it. Anyways, what did you make today? I’m starving.”

 

Jaehyun just flicked Johnny’s forehead, and then got up to get plates from the cabinet as Johnny was rubbing the redness from his forehead away.

 

-

 

“Did the pills I bought you last night work, Ten?”

 

“Sorry to break it to you Taeyong, but you got scammed yet again. I soaked a few of them this morning and they were just mike and ikes painted blue.”

 

Taeyong sighed deeply, “I’m really sorry Ten. I thought that I could trust these guys, I’ll try going back to see if I can find someone else that sells sleeping pills.”

 

This was the life of Ten. At 19 years old, he had yet to even have his first soulmate dream. At this point, he doubted that he would ever see them in his life. Ever since that doctor’s appointment at 15 years old when his mom noticed that he hardly ever slept, his fate had been laid out for him. An insomniac living in a world where his love life depends on him being able to sleep long enough to dream, how convenient. To make matters worse, there’s no real cure and the chance of some form of relief cost about an arm and a leg. Ten tried anything, literally anything. ASMR? The attempt failed miserably, he didn’t like the sensation it gave him in his ears. Night teas did nothing and he didn’t enjoy the taste of them all that much. He has a drawer in his room filled with candles, incense, and air fresheners all lavender scented. What a waste of money as they did nothing to make him sleepy. 

 

He’s lost hope, he tried really hard not to for the longest time, but ultimately he accepted the inevitable. Ten new the implication of being diagnosed with insomnia, if the universe deprives you of your dreams, then maybe you’re one of the unlucky few that are born without someone else in the world that’s connected to you. He hated this, he hated the whole system. Why did he and the others in the world with the same problem have to be deprived of a soulmate this way? Why did medication have to cost so much? Ten wished that he could participate in the excitement like everyone else. Yeah he hated how he was basically outcasted due to his insomnia, but a part of him couldn’t help but yearn for what he was being deprived of.

 

Bless Taeyong, for doing anything he could to help him out. The both of them recently stumbled upon an underground market that had several people claiming to sell the ultimate cure to his problems. However, several purchases later and there was still no hope. So many of them were just scammers preying on the vulnerable for their income. They painted such pretty promises of hope just to sell you overpriced garbage, however; that didn’t stop them from continuing to try. Ten knew that their optimism was making them into idiots that continued to put faith in these underground scammers.

 

But when the entire world is against you, sometimes that blind optimism is all that can help. 

 

Somedays Ten starts his day telling himself to screw the system and to live his life the way he wants to, and other days he finds himself laying in bed with tears wetting his cheeks after crying from frustration over not sleeping the entire night. He’s so tired, physically and emotionally, but he doesn’t want to give up. Ten wants to hope that one day he’ll manage to sleep for more than 2 hours and see a glimpse of that special someone that he’s meant to seek out. 

 

When Taeyong had his first soulmate dream, he put off telling Ten about it for weeks. Ten noticed that something was up because Taeyong was terrible at concealing his emotions. He had become really shifty and declined hanging out with him several times and Ten decided that enough was enough and cornered Taeyong in the men’s restroom at school. After several minutes of dodging the question, he finally confessed to being afraid of telling Ten about his soulmate dream. He didn’t want to make him feel bad or left out, to which Ten said that it made him feel worse for his best friend of 6 years to think that he wouldn’t be happy for him. Ten didn’t want his possible lack of a soulmate to be the reason Taeyong didn’t share details of his life with him. He found out that Taeyong’s soulmate was tall and broad shouldered, and that he was already excited for the next time he would show up in his dreams. 

 

In a way, Ten found himself living vicariously through Taeyong. He also indulged in those cheesy teen novels that gave really unrealistic and cringey stories of soulmates finding each other in high school or somehow knowing that they are soulmates even though they’ve barely had one dream about each other and couldn’t possibly know that quickly. Ten eats it all up, even though he knows it's ridiculous and he should be spending his time doing other things. He fills his bookshelf with these novels to fill up the void that not being able to dream has left in his life. 

 

It doesn’t help that he knows that there’s a cute boy that goes to the same second-hand bookstore as he does and also likes cheesy soulmate novels too. The boy probably has a soulmate of his own, but Ten can’t help but dream (haha) at least. Ten hasn’t made an effort to talk to him yet, he doesn’t know how he would do it. The guy always looks thoroughly engrossed in any book that he picks up, and Ten doesn’t know if he would react positively to him interrupting his time. So he just admires him from afar. Mystery boy is so much taller than he is and has a resting face that could intimidate anyone, but Ten knows better. He’s seen the way his curved up lips split into a smile while hes reading something. He’s seen the way that he’ll crouch down and baby talk with children that happen to go up to him and ask him how he got so tall. Ten wishes he had that childish confidence. Maybe one day he’ll get to have a decent conversation with him. 

 

Ten turns to speak to Taeyong again, “Anyways, I’m going to go to the second-hand bookstore again tonight do you wanna come with?”

 

“Yeah I’ll come, I need to find a book for this assignment I still have to finish so it all works out.”

 

Although Taeyong was his best friend, he didn’t hide his boredom after being at the bookstore for longer than an hour. Ten liked to stay there because there was an endless supply of books to read and it was generally quiet most of the time. There was the plus of possibly seeing mystery boy as well, but Taeyong didn’t need to know that yet. 

 

-

 

After being properly fed by Jaehyun, Johnny made his way to the bookstore. He didn’t realize how much time had passed until he stepped out of the apartment and saw the sun setting. Thankfully the bookstore didn’t close until later so he had enough time to find what he was looking for. Johnny was hoping to find some material on lucid dreaming, he wanted to make sure he had all the information he could get before he tried it out for himself tonight. Also, he was hoping to see if anyone had brought in more soulmate novels. He had already finished the few that were under his bed and he was aching for new content. 

 

Once inside the store, he quickly made his way to the aisle containing most of the research journals. Johnny already had a book that he was searching for, someone on the lucid dreaming website had recommended it and he was hoping that it was here. After about half an hour of searching, he found it wedged into the deep corner of the bookshelf. It wasn’t in the best condition, the outer cover was hanging on by a thread, but the inside was still okay looking so he settled for it. As he was walking out of the aisle he ended up bumping into someone that was just making their way in.

 

“Oh gosh I’m really sorry I didn’t see you there, are you okay?” Johnny frantically asked the victim of his lack of awareness of his surroundings. 

 

“Yeah I’m okay don’t worry too much about it.” The guy he ran into had a soft voice and was significantly shorter. Then again, most people were pretty short compared to Johnny. What stood out the most to him was the bright red hair this guy had. 

 

Jaehyun’s soulmate, could it be this guy? He did have that red hair he mentioned. Johnny decided to not let the conversation end so quickly, he wanted to get as much information as he could so that he could tell Jaehyun about it later.

 

“I really like your hair it suits you pretty well!” 

 

Jaehyun’s(?) soulmate smiled at the compliment, “thank you! My friend Ten helped me dye it the other day. I was nervous about going with a color like this but I’m glad i went through with it!”

 

Suddenly a new voice appeared from behind him, “you called, Taeyong?”

 

The red haired guy who’s name, Johnny could confidently assume, was Taeyong turned and looked at his friend, “oh Ten! I was just telling this guy about how you dyed my hair the other day.”

 

When Ten came into Johnny’s line of vision, he immediately zeroed in on the fact that he had black hair. He looked to check for piercings and he was pleasantly surprised that Ten had the ones that he was looking for. Was Johnny lucky enough to encounter his potential soulmate as well?

 

He spoke up again, “only good things right? I won’t forgive you if you talk shit Taeyong.” The both of them just playfully slapped at each other’s arms and Ten looked at Johnny again. There was something unreadable in the way Ten gazed at him, it gave Johnny chills along the nape of his neck.

 

He was too distracted in his thoughts to notice that Ten was speaking to him, “sorry what did you say? I couldn’t quite catch that.”

 

“I asked what your name was, it’s pretty unfair that you know ours yet you haven’t introduced yourself.”

 

Johnny mentally slapped himself on the wrist, “ah sorry sorry, I’m Johnny.”

 

He saw the way that Ten’s eyes lowered and focused on the book that was in Johnny’s hands. “Lucid dreaming huh? Sounds pretty cool.”

 

At the mention of lucid dreaming, Johnny immediately perked up. Maybe he could convince this guy to try it out for himself and see if they really were soulmates, “oh yeah, I was looking for this because I wanted to try it out tonight. Apparently if you and your soulmate lucid dream at the same time you can manipulate the dream to meet each other.”

 

Ten’s smile faltered a bit, “that must be nice, to be able to meet your soulmate that way.”

 

“You should try it sometime, maybe you’ll get to meet your other half even sooner.”

 

Johnny sees that Taeyong grabs Ten by the arm, looking to see how Ten will react. He’s a bit confused by Ten’s lack of enthusiasm. Wouldn’t anyone be excited about this?

 

“Sorry to break it to you Johnny, but I doubt I’ll ever sleep long enough in my life to be able to even try it out.” Ten halfheartedly tried to keep the smile on his face. Johnny then felt like a complete asshole.

 

“Oh I’m so sorry Ten, I didn’t know-” he gets interrupted by Ten, “and there’s no way you would have know so don’t beat yourself up about it. I’m fine, really. I may not have a soulmate but there’s a ton of soulmate novels in this store to keep me distracted.”

 

Johnny couldn’t help but still feel bad. He never thought that he would ever get to know someone who happened to not have a soulmate. All his life, Johnny had been obsessed with dreams and finding his soulmate, he didn’t know what he would do if he happened to be one of the few without a soulmate. He didn’t want to imagine it either, it was all too sad. The fact that Ten had to live his life with the reminder that he couldn’t participate in the search for his special someone made Johnny want to cry for him. He wouldn’t though, at least not in front of him.

 

Although Ten fit the few details that he knew of his soulmate, if he says that he most likely doesn’t have one, then Johnny’s soulmate is probably still out there somewhere. 

 

“Anyways, we should get going, I forgot that I left the stove on. Let’s go before I burn my apartment down Taeyong.” Before Taeyong could protest, Ten had already dragged him out of the aisle and towards the exit. 

 

Johnny saw them leave, and his heart felt the heaviest it had ever in his life. He tried to look at soulmate novels, but the fact that Ten had lost hope in a soulmate kept sinking its claws in his chest. They had hardly met each other, and had at most a ten minute conversation; but, Johnny wanted to help Ten. He wanted to bring back that hope that Ten had lost all these years.

  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Johnny and Ten can't stop thinking about each other, and Johnny falls into another soulmate dream during his lucid dream experience. Also, NCT DREAM is introduced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's chapter 2! sorry it took a bit to put out I've been busy with work and school but I've found sometime this weekend to post! I hope you guys enjoy this and please let me know if you guys have any feedback in the comments I appreciate every comment with all my heart! As always, you can follow my main twitter @nekojungwoo for any news on updates!

That night, Johnny finds himself sitting in front of his laptop screen at his desk. The only light in his room comes from the lamp beside his bed and the screen of his computer. His plan was to stay up a bit longer so that he would be tired enough for the lucid dreaming to succeed. Johnny had read up that if you’re more tired you have a better chance of waking up into a lucid dream since it’s easier for you to fall into REM. 

 

The webpage that was open on the screen of his laptop was yet again another forum, but this time it was a forum run by insomniacs trying to find safe ways to fall asleep. Many had mentioned their experiences with the underground sleeping medicine market and went into detail about the dangerous situations they have fallen into because of it. One person in particular described how they were sold a bottle of supposed sleeping pills that they quickly found out were actually laxatives after spending a few unpleasant hours. There was a common frustration these people had with being taken advantage of due to their desperate situation and how they felt like they couldn’t trust anyone anymore. Johnny felt himself tear up many times reading other people’s stories and experiences, a lot of of them felt really lonely and sad and angry at the world. At one point it got to be all too much and Johnny was about to click out of everything and put on some random youtube video to distract himself when he saw it.

 

_ I finally went to NCT DREAM and let me tell you, those kids may look like they’re too young to develop a form of cure but because of them I was finally able to sleep and have my first dream! _

 

‘Who or what is NCT DREAM?’ Johnny thought to himself. He continued to scroll even further down the forum and found a few more people commenting about NCT DREAM and how they were able to finally have a soulmate dream after spending a lifetime thinking they were going to be alone. A man in particular was 50 years old when he had his first soulmate dream and because of NCT DREAM he was able to find his partner and get married. Johnny became increasingly excited at this, when he reached the end of the forum and read all there was about NCT DREAM on there, he decided to dig a little deeper. 

 

Although Jaehyun tried to discourage him several times to not get the software to be able to access the deep web, he still did it anyways. He was especially glad he had done it now because after a quick google search he saw that the only info on the clear web that had to do with NCT DREAM was pretty much wiped. The only thing that came up was when people mentioned the name. Once he opened up his other software and searched it up, however, there was a significantly increased amount of results. After a few clicks into different pages, he was able to reach the NCT DREAM main page. Compared to everything else on the deep web, this page was a lot more colorful and bright. The intro to their website promised a cure for those that were outcasted from society due to their inability to sleep. There were no pictures of the boys that ran the account, but their names were listed in order of age. There were four that were born in 2000, Renjun, Jeno, Haechan, and Jaemin, and then Chenle who was born in 2001 and finally Jisung, the youngest of the group born in 2002. They were all so much younger than Johnny and have already developed and began distributing their own pills in protest of the current sleeping pill industry. They mentioned how one of their own had been diagnosed with insomnia and it motivated them to start developing and test running their own medicine. Johnny read on their site that they have to keep their page on the deep web and their faces anonymous as they pose a threat to a billion dollar industry and could be arrested for their project. The headquarters of NCT DREAM was located out of state, to Johnny’s observation. It wasn’t too far but it would definitely take a bit to get there. He wrote down the location of their headquarters into his notes and proceeded to look into NCT DREAM’s research tab. Over the span of 2 years, they’ve helped solve hundreds of cases and have helped many pairs of soulmates find each other. They have different types of medicine available depending on the severity and age of the individual. In the future, the group hopes to be able to bring their medicine out of the underground and into the mainstream market. The medicine isn’t costly to make and they could make it affordable to anyone no matter their economic situation. However, because of the power the current insomnia cure industry holds they’re worried that they’re project might be shut down and seized by the government. 

 

After a bit more reading, Johnny starts to feel himself get a bit sleepy, so he finishes up his notes and shuts down his computer. He hopes that he’ll be able to achieve lucid dreaming tonight, and sets his journal on his bedside table for easy access in the morning. The last thing on his mind before he drifted off to sleep was how excited he was going to be when he told Ten the news. He wanted to help this boy he barely met, Johnny felt that he couldn’t forget about him for some reason..

  
  


_ Johnny woke up, his body felt a bit heavy as if he was underwater. Although he recognized he was in a dream, he had a bit of trouble with making anything happen. He tried making his soulmate come to him, but nothing happened. Johnny figured that his soulmate wasn’t lucid dreaming with him. After what felt like only a few minutes, but was probably a few hours in the real world, he caught a glimpse of a person. He quickly recognized it as his soulmate, they had the same black hair and were once again looking away from him. Johnny figured that if he couldn’t meet his soulmate properly, he could at least try to get closer to his soulmate.  _

 

_ He tried taking a few steps forward, but Johnny’s legs felt heavy as if they were tied down to sand bags. His soulmate stood still and continued to face away from him, as Johnny slowly came closer to him he could hear faint singing coming from his soulmate. The lucid dream made the words come out in a form of jibberish with a few coherent words here and there. There voice was soft and beautiful, Johnny felt himself become mesmerized. Once he was within an arm's distance, he reached out and grabbed his soulmate by the shoulder. _

 

_ The singing stopped.  _

 

_ Their soulmate didn’t turn around, but they roughly tore Johnny’s hand away from their shoulder. _

 

_ Johnny spoke, “what’s wrong? Why won’t you show me what you look like? I want to find you and be with you so why-” _

 

_ His soulmate then broke off into a sprint, running as fast as they could away from Johnny. _

 

_ “No! Don’t do this again! I need to see your face you can’t just run off!” _

 

_ He began to lose control of his dream, everything was slowly fading to black. _

 

_ The last thing Johnny heard before he woke up was the same voice singing the same indistinguishable song. _

  
  


Johnny shot up into a sitting position the minute he woke up. The sky was still a bit dark but he could see the sun slowly creeping up and shining his room with a dim light. He turned to pick up his journal from his bedside table and began to write all the details he could remember from his dream.

 

Yet another unsuccessful attempt to see his soulmate’s face, but at least he knew they had a beautiful voice.

 

-

 

Ten wakes up to the same sky, after managing to sleep at 4:30 AM but yet again waking up after only about an hour and a half or so. Still not long enough to dream. He knows that he won’t be able to get more sleep that night, and gets out of bed to pour himself a cup of coffee to help boost his energy. He walked back into his bedroom and looked at himself in the mirror, he’d have to cake on the concealer since his dark circles were especially bad today. 

 

After drinking his coffee and washing up, Ten decided to open up a novel he had yet to finish, however he had a hard time focusing on the plot because his mind was busy thinking about Johnny and how he was tall and had a soft personality. Ever since he and Taeyong left the bookstore, Ten hasn’t been able to stop thinking about their encounter with him. He kept thinking about Johnny’s smile and the sad look he had on his face once he realized Ten was an insomniac. He hated it. Ever since he was a kid he’d seen that face of pity way too many times. Ten wanted to stop thinking about Johnny, to stop indulging his mind of his crush, but he couldn’t. Now that he’s gotten a taste of his personality, Ten found himself yearning for more. 

 

He knew that fueling this fantasy wasn’t good for him. Ten had dealt with heartbreak too many times in his life. Having a crush on someone was fun and exciting in the beginning, the limerence making his heart race and his palms sweaty. However, that feeling would quickly go away once he felt himself getting too attached. Ten couldn’t let himself get too emotionally invested into anyone because they would inevitably leave him for their soulmate, that’s how this thing worked. He fell for someone new one week, and by the next he was already moving onto the next infatuation of the week. Compared to his current situation with Johnny, he never interacted with the people he had a crush on. Although crushes weren’t discouraged, engaging with someone romantically who you knew wasn’t your soulmate was considered to be on the same level of cheating. Kids were taught from a young age to do no such thing with anyone who wasn’t your soulmate, and that’s how the system started. Ten remembered how hard it was for him when he was younger. The feeling of being left out of the excitement would be drowning him at times, and once everyone in school found out that he was an insomniac it only got worse. He did his best to hide it, but after not being able to lie his way out of talking about a soulmate dream he was eventually found out. The way that everyone looked at him with pity as if he was broken made Ten feel so angry with society and himself. 

 

Ten knew that he would eventually have to get over Johnny, and it hurt his heart a lot to know that. Johnny was everything he wanted in someone, but he would never be his true love. He would have to watch him walk away and into the arms of his soulmate, while he continued his life alone.

 

Maybe a visit to the bookstore will help get his mind off things. Ten was definitely not going to go there because he hoped to run into Johnny again. Not at all.

 

-

 

It took Ten approximately five minutes after walking into the bookstore to spot Johnny. As always, he was at the fictional novel section again, intently looking at the back of a lilac colored book. Before Ten could decide whether he should walk up to him or away from him, Johnny looked up and made eye contact with Ten. Ten softly smiled and waved at Johnny who quickly set the book down and walked over to him.

 

“Ten! I’m so glad I ran into you today! I have so much to tell you and I think after I tell you everything you’ll be just as excited as I am.” Johnny says to him, his eyes sparkling.

 

Ten smiles at him, “alright then, let’s go to the back of the store. I know somewhere quiet where we can sit.”

 

He leads Johnny to his favorite corner of the store, it was where he found himself a lot of times curled up with a book. In the corner was two couches with a lamp giving off a soft light and setting a warm atmosphere. Ten took a seat on one of the small couches with Johnny following and sitting on the one facing across from him.

 

Ten asks him, “so what was it that you wanted to show me?”

 

Johnny brings out his phone and opens up the notes app on his phone. He had transferred all the notes he took last night to his phone so that he wouldn’t have to bring all his notes with him and risk losing them. Also it helped to keep a second copy of everything just in case.

 

“I took what you told me yesterday to heart, and I decided to do some research of my own,” Johnny says.

 

“What do you mean? Research on what?” Ten asks him.

 

“I think I’ve found something that could possibly help you fall asleep long enough to dream. It could even help you have your first soulmate dream.”

 

Ten responds, “look johnny, I don’t know if you heard me correctly but I can assure you I don’t have a soulmate. Insomniacs aren’t supposed to have soulmates remember?”

 

“That’s just what this fucked up society wants you to think. They want to keep you dependent on their supposed cure and continue to have control over these people that are vulnerable. Do you think a billion dollar industry wants you to think you have a soulmate when they can just sell you an expensive ‘cure’ that doesn’t really do much and have you hooked on it?”

 

Ten sits back in his seat. Johnny does have a point, but he also sounds a bit delusional. There is no way that Ten could have a soulmate. There was just no way.

 

“I know this all sounds crazy, believe me I didn’t really think this was all legit at first. But, after some research on the deep web as well, all my doubts were cleared up.”

 

Ten asks him, “why did you have to do research on the deep web? Don’t tell me what you’re doing is illegal?!”

 

Johnny nods, “this is as illegal as it gets. The clear web has pretty much been wiped by the government of anything that has to do with NCT DREAM. They don’t want anything that had to do with them getting swept up by mainstream news sites.”

 

“What’s NCT DREAM? Why is the government being involved in this? Are you sure that this is legit Johnny and not just another scam?” Ten asks.

 

“How much time do you have? I’m pretty sure it’ll easily take me an hour to show you all the research I did. NCT DREAM could be your possibly savior and the gateway to you finding your soulmate that this society has convinced you that you don’t have.”

  
  



	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten and Johnny further discuss NCT DREAM. A road trip is in the works. Taeyong and Jaehyun worry about their friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for taking a bit with chapter 3 but its here! I hope you guys like the update and please let me know what you think! any and all comments are appreciated!
> 
> follow my main twit if u wanna @nekojungwoo and also if you are 18+ you can follow my more nsfw prompts and stuff on my other twit account @softdomjungwoo

The tiny room in the pediatrics office was suffocating Ten and the scratchy gown made of paper he was stripped down too was giving him a terrible itch on his neck. He could see his mother trying to reassure him with a warm smile, she was convinced that he was just going through his normal changes (aka puberty) and that’s why he wasn’t sleeping well. The doctor would come in, tell him to just eat better and that would be that. 

 

Neither of them were expecting the news that the doctor had in store for them. 

 

Ten still has trouble remembering exactly what happened. All he remembers is his mom bursting into tears, and then her pulling him in for a hug begging the doctor to tell her that it isn’t true.

 

“I’m sorry, there’s no other explanation for this I’m afraid. If you’d like, we could recommend-”

 

“There’s no way we could afford that. Is there really no other way?”

 

“Currently, there is no other solution for those dealing with insomnia. I’m terribly sorry for having to deliver this news to you. I understand the implications that this has for your son in the future. If there is anything you guys need in the future, please don’t hesitate to give me a call.”

 

The doctor leaves the both of them in the room. Ten can still feel his mother shaking from the sobs she let out. 

 

He couldn’t find it in himself to cry as well, or too feel much of anything at all.

 

The universe had just cursed him with a lifetime of loneliness, and he would have plenty of time in the future to cry about it. When he would have to see all his friends pair off and marry their other halves, Ten would only be able to feel that joy vicariously through them. When they started their own lives and their families, Ten would have to accept that he would never have the joy of raising a child of his own. 

 

That was going to be his life, and there would be nothing that Ten could do to change it.

 

-

 

Ten looks at Johnny as if he just asked him to drink his own piss, “Johnny are you sure it’s even safe to talk about this in public? If this really is as illegal as you say it is why are we discussing it in a bookstore of all places where someone looking for Fahrenheit 451 could easily overhear us?”

 

“I guess you’re right, do you want to come over then? I have my laptop and all my notes at home so I could show you all the research I did!” Johnny suggests.

 

“Look, no offense, but we literally just met yesterday and now you want me to come over?”

 

“So is that a yes?” Johnny asks.

 

Ten can not believe that Johnny is the way that he is, but he decides that it won’t be too bad if he just went over for a few minutes. Just to see everything, that’s all, he would leave after they both discovered that it was all a scam and there was no NCT DREAM or cure or whatever it all was. 

 

“Fine. You can go on and lead the way.”

 

-

 

Johnny’s apartment isn’t too far from the bookstore, in fact it was close enough for them to be able to walk there. Ten can see why Johnny goes to that specific store so often and stays there just as long as he does sometimes. The complex is small and generic looking on the outside, nothing too fancy and just enough to live in comfortably.

 

Johnny kept mentioning all these small details he couldn’t wait to show him about his research. He also mentioned a lucid dream he had the night before and that he has a journal full of all the dreams he’s had since he was young that he can remember once he wakes up. Ten wanted to be just as enthusiastic as Johnny, but it was hard to be excited about something you have never experienced in your life. He couldn’t exactly share that experience with him because Ten had no idea what it’s like and a part of him feels a bit lonely. 

 

They got to the door of Johnny’s apartment and Ten waited while he got out his keys.

 

“I’m sorry if it’s kind of a mess? I didn’t have a lot of time to clean up properly this morning so please excuse any crumb on the floor,” Johnny says as he opens the front door.

 

“You’re fine I have no room to judge anyone on their mess when Taeyong is constantly yelling at me for being so disorganized all the time,” he responds. 

 

When he stepped in for himself, Ten saw that the apartment was small but it looked properly lived in. The living room was filled with houseplants and the small brown couch in the living room had a big fuzzy blanket covering half of it. Johnny led him into a hallway that led up to a room at the end, when he opened the door Ten was surprised at what he saw. There was a huge bookcase full of books, many had tape over the spines and labels written in sharpie. The bed was a bit undone, and the desk on the other side of the room had a laptop and a stack of journals on the side. 

 

“Okay so, let me just turn on my laptop and get my notes out so I can show you what I did last night. I don’t even remember what time it was when i went to sleep I was that into it,” Johnny says.

 

Ten went ahead and took a seat on the bed as Johnny sat at his desk with his laptop. He looked around the room, although the walls were bare all the other things that were in the room gave it a johnny feeling. By the bed there was a journal opened to a page titled, “May 4th Dream log”. Ten was about to pick up the book when Johnny called him over to the computer.

 

“Alright so this is the software I used in order to get on the deep web. It was a lout easier to find stuff about NCT DREAM on here than on the clear web.” Johnny clicked on a link that brought up a page. “This is NCT DREAM’s main website. All the information I have in my notes about them was taken from here. They’re based out of state so if we were to go there it would be a bit of a trip. They even have different types of their cure depending on the severity of the insomnia and your age. This whole operation started when one of the members of this group was told they had insomnia and they all wanted to figure out if there was any other way they could get him to sleep enough other than the ones the doctor recommended. They experimented on themselves first and then branched out to see if people would test it out and they quickly become more known on the underground because of it. That’s how I was able to find them in the first place, a lot of people on the clear web would mention them in forums but any website that was centered around them didn’t exist on there.” Johnny explains. 

 

Ten looks at the webpage, and the detailed notes that Johnny had. He wanted to be cynical and doubt everything that he was just told, that’s just what he was used to. Things never working out for him so as a coping mechanism he just denied himself of feeling any hope of getting a cure. However, something about this and Johnny’s sparkly eyes as he excitedly showed him what he discovered made Ten want to believe in something for the first time. Although he hasn’t known Johnny for that long, Ten wants to trust him and feel safe in going into this rabbit hole of NCT DREAM.

 

“So you’re saying...that they could have a possible cure for me? How far away is it from us?” Ten asks.

 

“Well I looked into it and by car it would take about 3 days. We could take a plane but to get a plane ticket so last minute and for that long of a travel...my wallet is crying just thinking about it.” 

 

Ten replies, “well, why don’t we road trip it? We can just take my car and drive to where their headquarters is. It would be a bit cheaper that way and we can just stay in motels to sleep and hit up a small restaurant every now and then to eat.” 

 

“You’re down for a road trip? With someone you just met?’ Johnny says.

 

“Well you looked up how to possibly change my life after just having one conversation with each other, and honestly I have nothing to lose by doing this.”

 

“You got me there. Give me like two weeks so I can get enough money and we can map out how we’re going to get there. Is that enough time for you?” Johnny says.

 

“That sounds good to me. Just let me know what you plan out and I’ll make sure we both have enough money for gas, food, and motels.” 

 

-

 

After that day, Ten and Johnny keep in close contact. They exchanged numbers and Johnny would text him often asking if the route was okay and if he had any changes in his sleep schedule. He was really happy that they’ve grown close, although it was in the strangest circumstances Ten wouldn’t have it any other way.

 

They set the date for their road trip for May 28th, that gave them enough time to save up some money and get everything necessary for a 3 day trip on the road. At the moment, things were running smoothly for them and their plans, there were a few bumps when it came to drawing out their route but it wasn’t anything impossible to fix. 

 

The only issue that came up was when Ten told Taeyong the news.

 

“Ten I love you but what the fuck?” Taeyong had told him.

 

Ten knew that his best friend would react like this. He was always one to be extra careful and look not just twice, but six times before crossing the street. “Look Taeyong it’s not that bad okay! We have everything planned and we’re just a few dollars off from our goal and judging by how much time we have left we’ll probably have way more money than necessary! It’ll be just fine and even though me and Johnny have just barely gotten close I feel like I can trust him.”

 

Taeyong sighed and ran his hand through his hair. Ten had invited him over to his apartment so that he could let him know when he would be gone. They were at the dinner table with a small cake and mugs filled with coffee. Taeyong’s being mostly cream and milk.

 

“Ten, do you realize how dangerous this could be? You’re going to an underground operation that is extremely illegal with people you have no idea who they are besides their names. What if they hurt you guys? What if they aren’t who they say they are? What if you never get to come back home after this because the government is after you? I can’t lose you Ten you’re my best friend!” Taeyong is close to tears.

 

“Taeyong I’m just as scared as you are and I know that it could be really dangerous but if I don’t do this I have no idea whether I’ll ever have another chance again to finally get some relief from my insomnia. You know just as well as I do how difficult it’s been and I just want to at least TRY this.”

 

They don’t say anything for a bit, Taeyong is wiping at his tears with a napkin and Ten feels himself getting close to tears as well.

 

“...Tennie...if you go...please call me and keep me updated every night you’re gone I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep if I don’t at least hear your voice telling me you’re okay,” Taeyong says softly.

 

“Of course I will, and if I don’t call first please call me then. You’re my best friend and my platonic soulmate I don’t know what I would do without you,” Ten replies.

 

They both get up from the table and pull each other into a big hug, neither of them wanting to let go. 

 

“Also if Johnny hurts you in any way I won’t hesitate to track you guys down and cut off his dick. He’s already on thin fucking ice after being the reason you’re making this wild trip.” 

 

Ten laughs into Taeyong’s shoulder, “okay Taeyong, I’ll make sure he knows to watch out for you.”

 

-

 

Johnny had a similar issue when telling Jaehyun the news.

 

“Johnny, you know you’re my best friend, my bro, I love you, but please be careful okay? I know you and I know that you tend to give too much of yourself away helping other people out and I don’t want you to get hurt.” Jaehyun says to him.

 

“Look I know what you mean but it isn’t like that this time! Me and ten are both serious about this trip and I want to help him and give him hope again I can’t just live my life knowing I could’ve saved someone and not done anything about it. It would kill me inside to have to live with that.”

 

Jaehyun sighs, he knew that his best friend was a very kind soul that just wanted to solve everyone’s problems. However, Johnny would forget often that in between helping others he also needed to help and protect himself. Jaehyun didn’t want this trip to crush him if things went badly because he knew that Johnny would destroy himself wanting to get a resolution even if there wasn’t any. 

 

“Okay John, I know that I won’t be able to stop you going but I swear if you don’t call me when something goes wrong I’m going to be really upset with you. Please let me know you’re still alive once in a while okay?” Jaehyun tells him.

 

“Don’t worry Jae I promise! Also for the few days I’ll be gone would you please check on my apartment at least once a day to make sure everything is okay? I’ll give you the spare key so you can come in.” 

 

The two friends spent the rest of their day discussing the road trip plans and there were a few jokes from Jaehyun’s side about having to stay in motels with Ten. Johnny would just smack him and tell him to stop but he couldn’t deny that the idea that they were going to be in close proximity of each other didn’t unnerve him. There was still the fact that Ten resembled his soulmate WAY too much.

 

Johnny wouldn’t think of it too much. It didn’t feel right to think of Ten when he wasn’t even sure that he was his soulmate at all.

 

Once Jaehyun left, Johnny texted Ten to let him know about Jaehyun’s reaction and a few minutes later he smiled at how Ten explained how he got a similar talk from Taeyong. He was excited that the both of them were going to go on this adventure together and discover a whole new world. 

 

As the day of their departure gets closer, the begin to meet up with each other more and more. In between the discussion of their road trip they go off into tangents about their interests. If they end up meeting at the bookstore, Johnny would get distracted showing Ten one of his favorite soulmate novels and Ten would show him his favorite. They often curled up into a corner of the store with a coffee and a few books they picked out and would just read together. Although they would hardly exchange words with each other, they felt comfortable in each other’s presence. 

 

Ten found himself needing to force himself to look back at his book a few times. His eyes would wander off and end up looking at Johnny’s soft Cupid’s bow or the furrow of his eyebrows. Any little detail about Johnny, Ten would become absolutely fixated on it. He found Johnny to be such a beautiful man, and his heart ached at the thought that he would belong to someone else. Ten knew that letting his crush grow deeper was dangerous, but with the way Johnny’s eyes smiled when he laughed how was Ten supposed to not fall in love with him? He would practically melt whenever Johnny got closer to him to show him a good passage in a book. 

 

He didn’t know how he was supposed to survive 3 days alone with Johnny.

 

-

 

Finally, it was the night before they would begin the road trip. 

 

Ten was anxious but also really excited for what was to come, and he knew Johnny felt the same way. They two had FaceTimed for about 3 hours just discussing any last minute details and making sure they had everything packed. They were going to stop for gas before they officially hit the road and also pick up a few snacks and some water bottles. 

 

Right now, Ten was in bed staring up at his ceiling. He knew that he wasn’t going to get any sleep but he always seemed to get into bed every night anyways. Johnny has fallen asleep a long time ago while they were on FaceTime and Ten would never admit that he watched Johnny sleep for a few minutes before officially hanging up.

 

While Ten was having a sleepless night, Johnny was deep asleep and curled up in between his plushies. The same voice that was singing during his last soulmate dream was back, although he couldn’t quite make out the words but the soft voice keep coming in and out throughout his dream. The voice sounded a little familiar, but he couldn’t quite figure out why it was. 

 

Once the few rays of sunlight peeped over the horizon, signifying that it was now dawn, Ten got out of bed and got dressed. He managed to sleep for 45 minutes before eventually waking up. He put on some comfy joggers and a loose t shirt with some sneakers since he knew they were mostly going to be in a car all day and he needed to be comfortable. Ten grabbed his bag of things he packed along with a pillow and one of his favorite fuzzy blankets, just in case the rooms in the motels got too cold. 

 

He received a text from Johnny letting him know that he had woken up and was ready to go, so Ten hurried up and made sure every window was locked before leaving his apartment.

 

It was time to head for NCT DREAM. 

  
  



End file.
